schadenfreude

Introducing the first ever Sea Change Friday Fun Predict the Future Contest. Please answer the following question and submit your response by Sunday:

According to the secret “Caught Red-Handed” playbook distributed to all elected officials, Larry Craig’s next move will be to enter rehab for some sort of ailment that will explain away his airport restroom mishap. Which of the following disorders will Craig claim is the cause of his game of footsie with an undercover cop in the loo:

Alcoholism
Blood sugar swings caused by miserable airline food
Dependency on oxycontin he borrowed off of Rush Limbaugh
Restless Leg Syndrome
Something else (please specify)

Tie breaker: When will Craig disclose his heretofore unknown ailment?