When did you last ask yourself, “What do I really want?”

As leaders, it’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and forget to connect with ourselves. You’ve got a demanding professional life and busy family obligations. When would you have time to think about yourself? And isn’t that selfish anyhow?


Nourishing your own needs and charting your own path forward, will only support your professional and personal life. And you don’t have to stress yourself out with grandiose five-year plans. It can be something simple and immediate that you connect with. The important part is in the connecting.

So what do you want? Here are a few questions that might prompt your thinking:

(1) Are you missing anything? 

For example, right now, I feel like I’m missing tapping into my creative side. Maybe it’s something I want to address. Or maybe there are reasons to keep this on hold for now. The first step is noticing.

(2) Are you enjoying anything in particular that you’d like to have more of? 

Usually my exercise routine is mostly lifting weights. But recently, I’ve been enjoying doing interval running. I’d like to do more of that — and see if I can speed up my sprint times.

(3) Are you in a spring, summer, winter or fall season? If so, why? 

Just like the natural world, humans experience seasons in our lives. Sometimes, opportunities are blossoming like spring. Sometimes, we’re hibernating so we can rest up for the season ahead. And sometimes it’s all about the harvest.

Right now, I’m in the shoulder season between summer and fall. I’m finishing a long  period of intense personal work and I’m excited about the fruition of all that work ahead.

These questions are simple starters. If they don’t work for you, no worries. What’s another way you can connect with yourself to answer that question, “What do I really want?”